Even as an avid reader of “self-help” literature, there’s nothing that beats lived experiences. You can read all of the advice and guidance and tips that are on the market, but unless you’re putting this into practice – it’s pointless. Being armed with all of … Continue reading Lived Experiences
We’ve all been there before, filling cracks in the walls where plaster has shifted. Fill and sand and paint. Rinse and repeat. Or better yet, throw some wallpaper over them to hide them completely. But how often do we think about why those same cracks … Continue reading Papering over the cracks
Pushing all of your chips into the middle can be one of the more frightening aspects of playing poker. Unless of course you’re confident that you’re onto a winner! So why do we find it so difficult to commit fully in life when we know … Continue reading Going ‘All In’
Accepting that it won’t happen overnight is the first step. Understanding that it has a chance to happen in the future is the second. Committing to the process is what begins the journey. There’s no beating the grind. The turning up and taking your lumps … Continue reading Compounding for Progress
Nothing in life operates as purely a one way flow of energy. Whatever you’re striving towards, requires at least some response from where you’re aiming for. So why do we expect others to notice us without also taking note of others? Why do we expect … Continue reading One Way Streets
In a world that constantly pushes for perfection, take a step back and understand that nothing is truly perfect. Social Media Skew Believing everything that you see on social media is your first mistake. Nobody has everything perfect. We’ve become conditioned to see snippets of … Continue reading The Perfection Perception
Identifying that something isn’t going as hoped is one thing. Doing something about it is entirely another. Far too often when we know that something isn’t quite as it should be, be it in life, our jobs or hobbies, we simply continue doing what we … Continue reading What are you doing about it?
“Comparison in the thief of joy.” Nobody can do everything. But everybody can do something! Life today drives us to look at perfection, showing us an abundance of examples of others who are achieving our goals at an elite level. But that isn’t the norm … Continue reading Appreciation
In a modern world obsessed with the validation of others, it’s important to maintain your own sense of worth and not jeopardise it by basing your assessment of your value on how others see you.
Social media is one of the greatest developments of the modern era, allowing people across the globe to maintain contact, keep up-to-date with breaking news and allow people the freedom to explore the world from the comforts of their own homes. But it also has a lot to answer for in terms of self-esteem.
The introduction of the ‘like’ function shifted the user’s focus from ‘showing others what I’m doing or feeling’ to ‘how do others feel about what I’m doing or feeling?’ Giving over the power of emotion to others.
What you enjoyed, naively unaware of how others were receiving your posts and photos, now became available for others to consciously or subconsciously provide their opinion on.
The list is endless!
We became slaves to the like button, judging our own experiences and thoughts on the clicks of others. Sometimes removing the post if it didn’t hit the requisite numbers of interactions in a certain period of time.
So why not take back control? Ignore the likes that your posts get. Focus on the feeling you had with the experience that you are posting about, rather than the manner in which it is received.
It made you happy and you wanted to share.
It doesn’t matter how others received it.
What is it in our psyche that causes us to actively shy away from things? Not in terms of having an introverted personality, but instead seeking to keep ourselves away from the limelight, new experiences or new people.
For most the answer is likely to be simple; we fear failure.
That could be failure in terms of task, acceptance or a whole host of other outcomes that we create in our own minds. Nobody actively wants to fail, but why do we tend to consider failure more frequently than we do success? Why when we envisage talking to somebody new do we think – ‘what happens if they don’t like me?’ – rather than thinking – ‘what happens if we develop a bond?’
The mind is a formidable thing, but we need to harness its ability to provide us with a positive mindset, rather than allowing it to constrain our mindset to jump solely to the worst case scenario.
What happens if you do really like that new experience? What about if you demonstrate a talent for it? Could it become your creative outlet and be something that adds a huge amount of positivity in your life?
So go for it.
Stop focusing on the reasons why not to, and instead shift that thinking to ‘why not?‘
What’s the worst that can happen?
What Next? 